Don't Should On Me

Don’t “Should” On Me

“Do this.” 

“Do that!”

“You really should do this.”

Don’t you love it when people tell you what to do? Of course you don’t. No one likes to be told what they “should” or “shouldn’t” do.  Unsolicited advice can feel like criticism. It builds wall and separates people. Instead, build people up instead of knocking them down. Plant seeds of faith, trust and belief:

1.    Remember: Everyone has the right to make their own choices. Telling someone what they “should” do can feel like an infringement on their personal freedoms.

2.    Avoid Judgments. Using “should” often implies judgment and can make people feel criticized or inadequate. Give support and suggestions or share experiences without imposing expectations.

3.    Encourage Open Dialogue: Avoiding “should” creates a more open and respectful dialogue and encourages others to share their thoughts and feelings without fear of being judged.

4.    Promoting Positive Relationships: Relationships thrive on mutual respect and understanding. By not “shoulding” on others, we foster a more positive and supportive environment.

5.    Reducing Stress and Pressure: Constantly telling people what they “should” do can add unnecessary stress and pressure on them. Stop it. Life is tough enough already. Enough “shoulding” on people. Try listening instead.

 Instead of “shoulding,” lecturing or moralizing, let’s listen more and give people the leeway and freedom to make their own decisions.  Unsolicited advice sends the wrong message. Give people the dignity of their own path, so you can focus on yours.