Choose To Look Up Rather Than Down!

There's a poignant tale about two prisoners confined in a jail cell. One chooses to gaze at the stars, seeing the open sky brimming with potential and possibility, while the other fixates on the muddy ground. It’s a profound reminder of the power of perspective.

Similarly, in our relationships, we have the choice to focus on either the faults or the positive traits of those we hold dear. It's all about how we choose to perceive the world.

Dr. John Gottman conducted a twenty-year study on happy marriages and found that those who identified five positives for every one negative in their relationship had happier marriages even twenty years later. Perspective truly shapes our experiences.

Raising my son presented one of the greatest challenges of my life. At five years old, he was diagnosed with O.D.D. (Oppositional Defiant Disorder). There were moments like when the phone 📞 would ring, and he'd answer with, "shut up." After a while, I learned to "Actively ignore" the negative and focus on the positives instead, and thank God it worked!

What we choose to focus on expands and grows.

I once had a brilliant client, a doctor, who shared a remarkable story. His neighbor consistently parked too close to his car, making it impossible to open his door. Instead of confronting him immediately, he paused. Day after day, he waited. After a few weeks, he noticed the neighbor had left enough room. He knocked on his door and showered him with praise, thanking him for accommodating his car door. From then on, the neighbor always left ample space, and their relationship remained positive.

Catch those around you—neighbors, children, partners, and friends—in moments of goodness.

The choice is ours: whether to see the stars in someone or the mud.