I want to share with you a powerful tool that I use when I am stuck or in a funk. This method will teach you how to self-coach yourself in any situation.
First of all, I need to give you the steps to incorporate in the self life coaching method:
So, as you look at the top of the list you will see that circumstances are the first issue at hand. Your circumstance could be something that can or cannot be changed and may have to be accepted as permanent or not. Your circumstance could be associated with illness, financial troubles, relationships, death of a loved one, natural disasters, or a number of things. When self life coaching, circumstances may not change, but your thoughts, feelings, actions, and results can change. But, it is up to you to take the steps!
Let me give you an example of how this works. Let’s say I am in extreme financial fear, and my circumstance is that I don’t have enough money to make ends meet. My feeling is of hopelessness, despair, and I don’t see anyway out. Well, I can go to the root of the feeling which is the thought and change my thought to something that will self soothe me. My thoughts can be words of encouragement like:
-this is temporary and I will get through this one minute at a time.
-I choose to see abundance everywhere I look.
-creativity is one of my strengths, and I will solve this problem by thinking outside the box.
-I will put my pride aside, and ask for help.
So, I have changed my thoughts to create an immense feeling of hopefulness and courage, and it will now spill over to my actions of positive faith and creative doings. Then, ultimately I will get a much better result then if I ch0ose to be stuck in a hopeless and helpless thinking pattern.
A few years back, I placed a quote from Emmett Fox, on a notecard in my living room, that stated,“the only thing that I have to deal with are my thoughts”. I cannot tell you what an impact that sign had for me. Those bold words simplified my world by just reminding me to choose higher, more self soothing, and compassionate thoughts. This method could not be more simple, but at the same time rigorous. Old patterns of what I call “stinking thinking” or what a friend of mine calls “worst case scenario disorder” can be challenging to change, but I believe you can do it!!!
Give it a try or come to my workshop, "Mixed Up to Fixed Up" to get more wonderful tools. Thanks for reading and sharing!
"We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility of our future”
-George Berrnard Shaw
In our household, we have created a quick new set of words to remind us to stay forward focused, instead of being mired in the minutiae of the past. The phrase is, “rearview mirror”.
When any of our family members say, “rearview mirror”, we instantly change the direction of our words and thoughts towards the focused future of where we want to go. The future, the road, and the windshield are broad, expansive, and open.
When we keep our vision on what is behind us, it should be brief, just like the quick glance in the rearview mirror. Unfortunately, some of us stay transfixed on the past and miss the immense, clear windshield before our very eyes. Our future is ultimately expansive and filled with infinite possibilities and opportunities, if we just open our eyes to the largeness before us.
Personally, as I look back in the rearview mirror, it is often with morbid reflection, as opposed to all the amazing events that have occurred. As I write this, I commit to you readers, that I will choose to glance (not for long) at all the previous miracles that have happened in this lifetime. Then after I take notice of all the phenomenal events that have come to pass, I will place more attention on all the future events that will trump all my previous experiences, and keep you updated.
Where I am, and where I am going will be of more importance to me today, as opposed to looking backward. Today, I choose to plug into my GPS system;
Today, I know where I put my attention, I get more of the same. Yes, I will learn from my past mistakes, and move forward. Plugging into my successes, as opposed to my failures, has only created a better life for me and those around me. No more rehearsing the old negative story. It is time to move forward and focus on where I am headed, not where I've been!
Thanks for reading and sharing and remember always, always, always go where the love is. Namaste.
Do you want to salvage your marriage? Would you like to bond more deeply with your children? How about increasing your business? Well, there is one essential element to connecting with those around you on a deeper level. The secret is understanding their love language.
According to the book, “The 5 Love Languages,” by Gary Chapman there are five love languages. The five love languages are as follows;
4. acts of service
By understanding the predominant love language of your child, spouse, client, friend, or parent you can actually strengthen the bond by knowing what their soul craves in connecting.
A clear example of this is when the husband is working two jobs to provide for his wife and children, and the husband is working hard, thinking he is doing the right thing. Then one day, his wife asks for a divorce and he is baffled. The husband was working for the well being of both his children and his wife, he thought.
Well, with a little more research it was discovered that his wife’s love language was time and touch. She felt literally starved by her husband’s absence. By discovering his wife’s love language, the husband quit his evening job, cut down expenses, and then spent evenings with his family. The marriage was saved by simply discovering the needs of his wife’s soul.
Give yourself what you desire as well. I desire touch and compliments. So I make sure getting a massage is part of my monthly repertoire. Also, one of my love languages is compliments. I am a sucker for compliments. So, I give them to myself whether I get them from others or not.
Simply ask your children, coworkers, parents, friends, and partners what their love language is and them give them what they desire. It will truly change your relationship with yourself and others.
Registered Yoga Instructor Certified Life Coach